hey, what are you doing tonight?
sleeping, g'night!
but i wanted to see you :(
sleeping! g'night!(801): i miss you!
stop - you have a right hand - use it!
did not feel like going to store to get condoms last night so went to her pantry and got a sandwich bag and a rubberband
did it work?
nope
you shoved the noah's ark of animal crakers in your mouth saturday.
great sex! but now the fight over who sleeps on the wet spot starts.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Caught my drug dealer jacking off. I think this is a new step in our relationship
Does hooking up with the gay pledge count as hazing?
I've started a list of places i want to drink. To go along with the list of places i want to have sex. Lincoln's log cabin is on both.
OH BABY IM HERE AND IN A BLANKET FORT
COME TO THE BLANKET FORT
I have a weapon and I'm not blacked out. Good as gold
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yup. Can I borrow your penis decanter for my Xmas party on Saturday
All I know is that every time I looked at my glass it was full again and I thought it would be rude not to drink it
FUCK the WHO, FUCK cancer, I'm gonna eat fucking bacon.
The last thing I need is a possessed urethra.
Just ate 2 pieces of pizza in the shower.. New low or fuckin brilliant??
Hey mike is locked out, sleeping on the common room couch, no idea where his pants are nor does he know where he is. When you get this let him in? And let me know ur alive too!
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