i found out what alaskan girls practice during those six months of darkness
why do all the strippers look like they came from fraggle rock
areolas are like halos for boobs.
hypothetically speaking is slutty or smart to buy plan b before we go on spring break so i dont have to get it in mexico
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No, not at all. Pulling a condom out of your vag at 2pm is NOTHING like finding $10 in your winter coat. Stop trying to make me feel better.
sooo....i just remembered that someone fed me a pretzel out of their purse at the bar last night.
The only good thing about this is that the pharmacy guy will stop trying to add me on Facebook.
As we're eating sushi she goes I just want to get a disease so my mom can take care of me... Great first date
How much money would it take for the bouncer to get us beers while we wait in line to get in?
$450 apparently whoopwhoop
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Last night you said you were going to stop drinking and then proceeded to dip cookies in your vodka.
Sadly that explains a lot.
I just woke up ass naked on top of all my sheets, with no blinds in my room because i used them as togas, my back is killing me, im covered in sharpie, i have no memory of last night, and im pretty sure im still drunk. I consider the night a success
I also woke up in a guys bed in a Reptar shirt yesterday morning staring at a movie theater sized poster of the not as popular Air Bud franchise movie Super Buddies.
I JUST BROKE A NAIL MASTURBATING. WTF I could even enjoy my orgasm bc now I'm gonna have to spend $50 on my nails.
Yeah last night got weird fast. No lie, a kid pulled a butt-plug with a tail out of his ass.
remember when we said that thing when we met about how we were each glad we weren’t furries
ok listen,
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