im going to forcibly insert an angry corn snake into his urethra
So i looked up from her cooch and there was her ex-boyfriend
Awkward
You looked cold, so i decided to make you a blanket out of sticky notes.
Wtf. I just got invited to a threeway bj session in the bathroom at boiler. Lmao
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I dont know how to respond to your rave picture. I mean yeah, he's hot, but it just seems wrong to be like "Please tell me you fucked that guy with the pacifier!"
I just want to fall into a pit of xannies and eat my way out.
Went to the elf storage building to help him get his old dresser. Found his brother's stash in the drawer and ended up passed out w him on the mattress in there instead.
who started the 'put a scrunchy' around his balls' game?
He got weirdly turned on by the video of my cat licking nacho cheese off my finger.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's a psychology major, so instead of becoming a stripper, I'm just working out my daddy issues with him. And his cock. And spankings.
They're much more educational now btw. Don't judge.
It's all fun and games until your in the alumni campus center puking on the floor
for once I'd like a one night stand where I don't meet the guys mom or wife in the morning
I'm so bored I talked to the Bible guys for 30 minutes.
I offered them beer last time they came here bahaha
I woke up to him watching me sleep and after I told him it was over he asked if we were still on for Vegas next weekend
Woke up way too warm in the middle of a spooning sandwich. Was working up a rant about still not wanting a threesome. Then I realized the littlest spoon was the dog. Might need to break up anyway.
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