I think i'm just gonna start shot-gunning everything that comes in can form.
They need a stunt cock, be about 20 more minutes.
I bought a police grade breathalyzer on ebay at 4:37 am. At least I'm a responsible drunk.
1.) where are you? 2.) you making meatballs? 3.) Meatballs for sex?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she never specifically said NOT to fuck her boyfriend so technically we can still be best friends
he got mad becuase i made more noise when he gave me a back massage then i do when we actually have sex
Nope my penis exudes pure oxygen in times of crisis.
I'm just trying my hardest not to get addicted to drugs or pregnant and all your other friends are out there getting married
you know it was a successful halloween when you wake up and have a firecracker in your tits
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I won't let penises inside me if you won't let tequila inside you, deal?
I get so many dick pics from him...He has an unhealthy obsession with his own penis...
No one should ever be so high that they forget the food. That's just...its a violation of God and Nature, of the very laws that we live by!
The poop emoji wasn't even in my recents. Does that mean I'm growing up?
Of course that's what I'm wearing. I need to find a beard to mount and ride STAT.
Oh please. Preoccupy yourself with my penis.
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