theres bread in your mailbox im going to eat it
nevermind its newpaper
so i was eating a special k bar this morning for breakfast and started choking on it so i reached into my bag for water turns out it was liquor.
Pretending to care to care about playoffs in exchange for free shots. I'm sorry in advance.
I think he just gave me the 'I used to sleep with your sister' discount
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Put a customer on hold today while I threw up. If I don't get employee of the month, I'm suing.
Haga you didnt jbsii whee wu an therer
Party on wayne
I was informed that last night we held hands while puking on the curb outside the bar.
We just have a real special relationship.
I am dressed. And we didn't do anything. He's gorgeous and tall tho. Something nice to look at when I'm hungover
So did he inherit the massive family cock?
:(
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ah that wonderful moment when you realise the bookmark you were using in a book you lent your mum is actually a receipt from a strip club
I did all i could do but i woke up smelling like cigars and theres salsa all over my face
Apparently, Lolla sends you an email every time you use your wristband to buy a beer.
21 new emails...yikes
I just showed this kid my nipples to work my shift tmw
literally who communicates this much post-hookup why r u like this
rock bottom is drinking straight vodka from a protein shaker, singing one direction and crying alone in your room. exams.
Randomize