Mom found my vibrator. all the said was 'wow, I've never seen one like this before.'
we don't live in the stone age anymore, mom
Yeah, but I'm out of licorice and there's no way anywhere near here will rent us all mopeds on a Tuesday night.
just landed in detroit. Currently holding a bag of my own vomit. neighbor told me it was the most graceful vom she has ever seen. Kicking off bar exam week in style.
what is the aproppriate waiting time between having sex and playing super Mario brothers
6 min
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel like I spend my weeks apologizing for my weekends.
We found him pissing on the sidewalk in his socks signing the national anthem. I love you summer.
You hid from a cop under some guy's canoe on his lawn.. It didnt work
If this party got busted it would be an improvement
i want to be friends with one of those mini shredded wheat men.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You were, but he disappeared after you said you wanted him to get you pregnant so you'd have a child by the time the Boy Meets World sequel starts
I was looking threw the photos on my phone. There is 8 different ones of us peeing on things.
Being pregnant feels like you have a hangover everyday.. Don't listen to what anyone says about how wonderful it is
Such a shame we didn't work out. We would've been a power couple producing NFL linemen :/
She looked up and said "I like this." I asked "what do you like?" she said "penis."
Leave it to my mom and I to turn the hearing into a drinking game.
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