why isn't there a fb relationship option that says 'still banging my ex'
I walked in and she was doing shots, betting the managers if any of the customers would notice, and screaming that nothing would ruin her Saturday night. Say what you want, I like working with my sister.
this is random but who was banging in the shower in our condo?
Don't count me out just yet. Considering bartering a blowjob to see if that boy from work will take my shift.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The mystery gender stripper never showed up with that party burrito last night.
Nothing like running into your favorite bartender in the middle of the afternoon while stone cold sober and being told your grabbed his penis the last time you were at his bar. My bad.
According to him, i kept saying "I'm belligerent as SHIT" and tried to run around the house in just my bra and underwear. Thats when they decided to carry me to the car and take me home.
When everyone ask you tomorrow go ahead and tell them I'm the girl that fell of safe ride and was all bloody.
Why were you not born a dude?
Because god wanted to level the playing field
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also, I pretty much need an IV of fluids straight to my soul
I snorted xanax while wearing reindeer antlers. Prancer gone wild. Have a merry Christmas.
How many ballsacks did you see last night because I saw eight
He was basically a horny puppy - following me around all night and kept sticking his hand down my pants.
Seltzer and cocaine. Life is flawless right now.
Hitting up all my dealers for my birthday grams is paying off
Randomize