I figured girls wouldn't be down to sleep w/ a guy who plugged a pregnant chick
Text. Mid BJ. 8 points.
Tell Heather sorry for burning her hair. Also for anything else that I may have done that warrants and apology. Anything after about 10pm is kind of hazy.
have you ever noticed that homeless people never have acne. suck it proactive
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I went down on her for at least a half hour, She loved it, so I thought she'd recip. She said "I only do that if I know I'm getting something out of it."
SHUT IT DOWN.
weed brownie and a latte, breakfast of champions
I just want to go some place where I can have a nice night. Grind on men who speak no English, make out with a girl, and not feel judged.
Have you ever wondered what your stripper song would be?
I like the wholesome side of you
I'm so goddamned horny I could use all my pent up energy to tear a redwood out by its roots.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just yelled out loud for someone to buy me a drink, 30 seconds later random guy on grindr asks what I'm drinking.
There's a 98% chance your drink will taste like rohypnol
Can we discuss your tits for a sec? That melon patch sprung up over night
Ok despite the fact that both you and I love dick we could have a great marriage
Geez don't go to a bar for a few days and everyone freaks out.
You know you went through something intense when you actuallu applaud yourself for not shitting your pants
You know getting black out drunk at a cats birthday party should have been my lowest point drinking wise but some how I feel like last night was some how worse
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