I just got asked by a man in the alley if i would like to buy 50 dollars of meat for 20 bucks. Its been a weird day.
Big sunglasses are the new paper bag
ya. and they're way easier to confince girls to wear during sex
So he sent me a text that said "say hi to your vajayjay for me"
Was there any message he wanted you to relay to your asshole?
I'm not sure if what i'm hearing downstairs is sex or not, but if it is, it sounds like there's a dog involved...i'm mildly concerned.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have only been in this city 3 nights and there are already 4 bars I can never go back to again.
She's good at three things and two of them involve dicks. And other one involves her love for arts
Just quiet vomiting, and in between heaves she mumbled "be the pro"
Hillary is trying to make pickle pops with vodka and sell them to kids at the ball park.
90% sure you snuck in there somewhere, all I really remember is big boobs in my face so I'm assuming it was you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Drunkkker than when I told the drag queen she was prettier than me
remind to leave next time the words "tequila" and "challenge" are shouted
He said he wanted to start giving out "sex souvenirs". I got a poster with a penguin on it.
Went to 7-11 to buy condoms with the $20 I found on the ground outside Rite Aid. A good day for drug stores
I just want you to make me second guess my worth as a human. Is that too much to ask?
he high fived his dick after we had sex
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