The walk of shame is so much worse when you've spent the night third wheeling.
Swine flu is the new snow day.
Things are going great. I have tons of beer, margaritas, and theres an inflatable swan in the mix.
She just got in car wreck. Wreck sex is better than break up sex
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I took the chef home. His dick even tasted like garlic
And in my birthday dress, with my friends, i peed on myself in line for the club. Still went in and partied. I remember pieces
I'm drunk at McDonald's in a fairy costume at 10 am nearly two weeks after Halloween. I don't think the Ohio State fans get it.
Ahahhahaha I'm not that stupid but then again I thought cabo was in Africa until yesterday
Chill out, I'm getting ready as fast as I can. I didn't even masturbate in the shower.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
candyland with pharmaceuticals ... what could go wrong
I had 2 shots but she spilt one on me. Kinda mad but kinda grateful
If he doesn't fuck you on the 4th of July, he doesn't really love this country.
while on the topic of showers...why is there apple juice in our bathtub?
I woke up naked in a tent. I was more upset that the air mattress had deflated.
None of what you just said was coherent
I just bought wine at a gas station what the hell do you expect
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