grad school is all the worst parts of undergrad, without the binge drinking and bad decisions to make up for it
i jus got home and totaly forgot i had nut all over the back of my shirt
..im mad u rememberd about that
Watching Argentina vs Germany during a wedding on an iPhone. Thank you Steve Jobs.
thats the sluttiest christmas spirit ever.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Shoot me. I need tickles, a drink, sushi and a handy
Order is debatable
Tonight, I'll be cleaning. And by cleaning, I mean drinking booze and spraying everything with Febreze.
There's jello in my purse I have a mysterious glow stick and didn't sleep with anyone my god I'm 3 for 3 tonight
I was grinding on people that were grinding. Nonconsensual.
If your nipples ruin my wedding photos I will kill you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Apparently he walked into the room and started yelling at some huge hairy dude to get out of my room. Except it wasn't my room... Because he was on the fourth floor.
Plus, I have my cousin, the dominatrix, to help me out if things get out of hand
the only reason I'm still sleeping with him is to get the university's secure wifi password
Like I said, all hypothetical...unless, of course, you'd be into that. My heart may skip a beat.
Currently standing at the bus stop in just a pillowcase and its fucking snowing
dad says come back and get the lawn mower out of the pool before mom gets home
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