Fine. I'll sleep in my office
out of nowhere you said let us see your boobs, then proceeded to pull my shirt down.
i gets down
It says i should accept HIV aids as my friend on facebook.We have 12 friends in common. I need new friends.
How do you tell if you're on the terrorist watch list?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just did a line with lance bass. Only in NY
Some guy thought i was the waitress and handed me his credit card. drinks on me.
My contribution to the dinner party was a bottle of vodka and a bag of uncooked potatoes. I felt like a Russian serf.
A guy in a banana suit just got the whole bus to participate in a call and response version of Bohemian Rhapsody. HERO
Like theyre better than no shoes. I'm sitting her balls naked playing xbox in nothing but crocs with the fur
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ummm, my mojito just spilled on 2 essays as I'm grading. Who says high schoolers have all the fun?
My favorite thing about your netflix account "suggestions for you" section: Russias Toughest Prisons is followed immediately by Strange Sex
Stormed out of the house in frustration and now I'm in public and have to take a rage dump. Today sucks.
Nothing says "I Love you" like my dick in a pizza box
We should just do therapy together, clearly we have all the same issues. It's why we are friends.
OH MY GOD YOU GUYS I JUST FOUND OUT I HAD PHONE SEX THE OTHER NIGHT
Randomize