im orety awesome arent i? relly i know i am
You can bone my sister, but I will end our friendship if you write 'LOLERS' one more time at the end of your texts.
I've decided that life's journeys are more fun when your moral compass hangs in front of you and swings with each step
there's nothing like the elf drinking game to get me in the christmas spirit.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my coworker just texted me asking if i remember pissing in the mop bucket at the gas station
Everything is fine now . The coast guard said we just can't take the inflatable trampling out past the break way anymore
They were actually really boring considering how we met them.
howd you meet them?
They got shit-faced and decided to take a train to a city none of them had ever been to. We found them wandering the ghetto, with a bottle of gin and singing Disney songs.
I like the odds of his and my children being professional athletes too. To support me in my old age, see I do think about the future.
What's the politically correct way of saying you've made someone your bitch?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've decided he is effectively a mouth, hands and cock held together by bad ideas and compliments, and I'm OK with that.
Turn on the Discovery Channel
Lets fuck to motorcycle gang fighting
Everyone was in jail by 10:30. I'd say it was a successful bachelor party.
I need my comforter. Pls bring it to me and drape me in it like an animal pelt. Ps I'm naked.
So technically I made out with my second cousin this weekend... But it's by marriage and I'm adopted, so it's ok.
The neighbor just poured gasoline on his 2 brush fires and proceeded to shoot Roman candles at them 🤔
Randomize