This is the last time I call a hotel to see if you or some random guy paid for the room last night.
we were like drunken butterflies among sober caterpillars,
So I have the hangover from hell, spent all night puking, and there's a septic tank truck parked outside the house literally pumping shit. You win God.
went from writing my paper to watching obamas speech to crushing beers and singing springsteen in a crowd of 100 within 20 minutes. I love this country
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Its... i dont even know. theres lots of rap music and i cant find my shoes
She made out with the kickboxers bf. She was just asking to get kicked in the head. In the middle of the bar.
Sleeping with random people is the same as soul searching, right? Ps that wasn't a team name suggestion.
He wanted to drink hypnotic from my butt crack. I need to move out this state.
Also this freshmen guy is talking about his gag reflex and no one is making blowjob jokes. I have no faith in the next generation.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I vaguely remember hanging my bra off the ceiling fan and chugging a beer during sex
College has turned you into quite the multi tasker huh?
She looks well worn, presumably from a cavalcade of penis.
He is so sweet! He thanks me for sending him dirty pix. I should keep him.
i just sexted for my mom while she was driving, i have hit an all time low.
Starting to realize that fucking everyone I come across isn't the most... "adult"... coping method.
i just realized i have only had sex on couches so far this year. i can't decide if that's impressive or trashy
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