I'm really into asian looking animals
I just Organized my jello shots by their colors in my mini fridge for the rest of the week. I'm going places in life.
47 days without vaginal penetration. Im pretty sure it's grown over.
Do you realize that if your cunt was a missing person it would be assumed dead?
You were pretty fucked up... decided playing hopscotch down the stairs was an excellent idea.. it was extremely entertaining
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Maybe it was silver. I don't know. I was drunk sifting through my dogs vomit.
Februarys looking very promising in the vaginal department
He's just giving off this "someone be a bitch to me" vibe
Here you are just trying to masturbate and I'm talking to you like your an initiate for some secret society.
We'll just charge in there, all pant less and fabulous demanding he give back her ferret.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You better fucking tell me or I'm turning blow job week into go fuck yourself week.
Went home with a dude from UF last night. Just dripped chicken onto my phone and then licked it off. Going to pick up a bridesmaid dress. Mid 20s in a nutshell.
How is it medically possible for my urine to smell like espresso
I'm writing off my condom expenses in my taxes
I love everything about him! His penis, his hair, his tattoos, his penis, his cat, his penis.
My Dachshund waddled into the room carrying a rolled-up pad in her mouth with period blood. This day is clearly off to a good start.
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