i think i may have caused an international incident at the french embassy, just fyi
hahaha how?
its a long story involving a horse trailer and some shrubbery
Apparently when you order 'bottomless fries' at red robin that doesnt mean you can go around to every table and eat all the fries you want off other peoples plates.
Ever since he's come out, my facebook stalking experience has gotten uncomfortable
Me + Nice restaurant + Copious amounts of booze + obscene comments to couples = valentine's day plans
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You realize it's finals week?
Ya that's the school's fault. St. Patrick's day came first.
it appears as though my vagina has gotten the best of me again
Remember that crazy chick I've been ignoring and said I wouldn't bang her again? Can we start that again part today?
Other than a hickey from some random Canadian roller derby girl, I came out unscathed
I tried to stop that, but then I pulled the leaves out of my panties and went to sleep.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well he was mad because I chose tequila over him. He obviously doesn't understand that he will always be second to my first true love.
Sorry, It's like OkCupid Olympics... categories: best sext, best dick pic, and most effort by ugly. You won gold in the last event if that makes you feel better.
Lol I wish they went straight to your cock then shot out into my mouth like a cock nacho dispenser
Never start off a conversation with "speaking of STD's..."
sex on a trampoline, in the rain, on ecstasy, just thought you should know.
Everyone else's "needs" are getting in the way of my alcoholism.
Randomize