How drunk are you??
I'm flawless.
I now officially know the distance between my two boobs is one twizzler.
Tonight has been like a good ass fucking high school movie
I'm drinking margaritas out of a soup mug, of course I'm going to get wasted
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every single one of us blacked out. we woke up the next morning and it was like the night never happened. IT'S STILL A MYSTERY
i just dedicated my kegstand to your breasts
Sundays should be dedicated to Girl Scout cookies, sex, and super hero movies.
Brilliant thought; pill pong.
What could go wrong?
It is. We should just be drunk all the time forever everything is like just 90% more perfect
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His hands kept asking for sex, but all I could think was "dude, this is going to ruin my high".
So it turns out "let's pretend to be gay so guys will stop hitting on us" was step one in her plan to get me into bed...
ditto.
about cumming, not toast
Can we make love to the Space Jam soundtrack?
Drunk me commented on almost all of her pictures. My favorite one is titled "be as the sea". My comment is "cold, rough, large and letting anyone come inside you. you accomplished." Guessing I'm not invited to the party anymore.
you're now officially the 3000 mile booty call. congrats.
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