Hoooooo maaaaan
Yes?
I'm retarded. Again.
8th day he invented the big mac, 9th he invented pop rocks, 10th day boobs.
We just passed a billboard that said to join "jerseydoesntstink.com" and literally 15 seconds later, we could smell jersey.
The guy I wanted to make out with just got beat up, let's roll.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Horrible. I told her my girlfriend is in the hospital and she tried to give me a lapdance.
I am still STD free so as far as I am concerned I never went to panama.
One day her vagina is just going to shrivel up and seal itself with it's self preservation mechanism
Some girl took her panties off, soaked them in vodka and wrung them out into a line of guys' mouths! Awesome!
No, NOT awesome. Where the fuck do you go drinking!?!
Its like drunk me is Oprah except instead of a car everyone's award is seeing my boobs
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We got signed out of jail by an Uber driver. I think that qualifies as a great first night of college
Nobody feels the need to text me back. Men. And I sent myself a message saying nakedness. I'm all the man I need.
I know him enough to fuck him but not enough to give him advice.
Just wiped the ashes off my forehead before he came over to have sex. Definitely going to hell.
I was lying I actually don't, I hope a reindeer shitted in her bed
People like you and me aren't meant to go this long without having sex
Randomize