I like bacon cheeseburgers and the pussycat dolls
Does that mean you want me to loosen up your buttons at carls jr?
I twisted my ankle last night doing a super high five with 3 inch heels on.
I just saw a pair of panties stretched over a fire hydrant on campus... I need to get the fuck out of this town
im at a loss of words.... a stripper is dancing to a Justin Bieber song.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think I ordered pizza when I got home. The email said the delivery time was noon today. So if that shit shows up I am the most amazing drunk on the planet.
Had a farmer come into my class to talk to us today. He apparently met his wife on fb and just thanked jesus for his land. I think I am in the wrong major...
she got the salsa and pickles out of the fridge looked at me and said what can i make with this
Is it wrong in Austin to talk to the homeless while I feed a bird my chips??
Last time I went to flagstaff I threw up in my beard. I would very much like to recreate that moment.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
High moment. Almost just passed the blunt to the dog.
He has a lot of emotional energy invested in your vagina.
You left something at the house but since I'm back home now so I can just mail it over. Address?
I didn't realize you could put dignity in a box these days.
stop fucking thinking about him when there is A MILLION OTHER PENISES TO RIDE IN THE WORLD
I knew he was a classy dude because when I told him my name was Jen he said "Gin? Like Gin & Juice?"
on a campus of 30,000 people, i should not be able to see every single guy I've ever hooked up with at one party.
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