Being a girl sucks.
Being a boyfriend sucks for about a week, too
Some dude just bet me $8 I couldn't smoke a pack of cigarettes in an hour...It sounds stupid, but I really wanna do it. If I survive, I'll have $8 and it'll look good on my resume.
is drinking for groundhog day legit?
well you blacked out on MLK day and we pregamed arbor day, so yes
yeah i fucked her in the storage room on the inflatable mattress. i don't know if i should feel proud for me or bad for her.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The fact that its 10am on a gameday and I have yet to shotgun is absurd
I came home ate all of my roomates poptarts and then vommited on her duvet cover. I don't think today is the day to suggest the whole "sex instead of rent money" idea
He offered to drive me out of state to meet up with my fuck buddy. Like best brother in law ever.
I'm gonna hire strippers dressed like the founding fathers.
We are going to get high as balls and watch netflix
THIS IS WHAT BEING AN ADULT LOOKS LIKE
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Mom called her a cunt. I think that's code for "don't bring her over ever again."
New low. Just realized I hooked up with a guy from Grindr in the hallway of a building my great grandfather used to own..
I just gave him road head. He came in the Taco Bell drive thru which seems pretty typical for my life.
I'm going to book club and then I'm going to get laid. Being in your 20s ain't so bad sometimes.
Fun fact: My predictive text now prompts "walrus" as the most likely word to follow "intoxicated"...
Who put my cat in the fridge?
Randomize