awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
Just had to open a tuna can with a spoon. Gave me a sense of hunting for my own food.
two more shots til everyone in this club gets to see my cesarean scars.
True Life: I hate vaginal excretions
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so many types of cookies right now. i'm eating four kinds of cookies that i've made into larger cookie sandwiches. too high. whoa.
she took her bra off and it was like the puppet strings had been dropped. her tits totally deflated.
she named my penis "gigantor the baby arm"
Guy next to me is looking up how to press his own ecstasy pills. I'm going to befriend him and see where this goes
I cried singing "call me maybe" on the way home from the bar. What the fuck
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
where are you?
talk to ya later, gotta sled down these stairs real quick
Also one of my neighbors is blasting "pumped up kicks" and possibly butchering some chickens
Who the fuck cries when they're stoned?!
Sorry man I just really wanted a McChicken
He was pretty bad, I wanted pizza the whole time.
I feel like I may be the only person who can say they crutched their walk of shame. past the secret service.
it wasnt weird until his dog watched upclose as i put a tampon in
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