pwbgyin
what?
penguin condom
This kind of poor decision making requires a real cup, not a mason jar.
I found her in the bathroom licking her screwdriver off the floor. she said there was no way she was wasting a $6 drink.
If we see one freshman that cummed on me, we are leaving.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He's yummy.
HE'S GAY. AND 40.
Irrelevant.
I gave him 3 xanax and recorded the ball drop. He's gonna think tonight is New Years.
Just getting in the shower.... found a "great job" sticker stuck to my boob.
So how was your night?
And I just found out I called my debit card a fast food passport so I dont deserve to live
I ripped my favorite jeans crossing that fence
That sucks
It's an upgrade! I didn;t even have to unzip my pants to pee!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Strip clubs just aren't as fun when a man tries to drunkenly grind on you.
Six words: 3rd Degree Burn On My Dick
I'm either a high functioning alcoholic or I'm making the most of the fact that this is the last year that its socially acceptable to be black-out drunk five days a week.
He made me tacos after the sex. Best date ever!
I'm taking the day off so I can get drunk at Whole Foods before noon
And then he peed in my hair
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