well that was a long night...
dude, you were pretty messed up... what happened?
no idea... but i still woke up with my pirate hat on
Thank you for leaving pool of vagina on my girlfriends carpet.
We did face masks and fucked...he really isn't gay, what they say about europeans is just true
Two hours into move in day and the ambulance is here already.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We went to his house and he brought a jar of pickles to bed. I think im in love.
You insisted I take photos of you vomiting off the top of the tree.
I just had to give myself a pep talk to stop lying on my floor. Literally too hung over to function
that ring i bought was worth the 6 bucks. wore it to the bar, told some girl i was recently divorced and wasnt ready to take it off. just got laid. THRICE.
She sent me a map and directions for a booty call. In a park. Give me reason not to marry her.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I will not remember tonight for the most part. This text will be evidence. You can and probably will use this against me.
We need to drink more. Just think how awesome it would be to wake up in a trailer and NOT remember how wee got here.
Cant really say how it happened but i woke up in the middle of the night and somehow pissed all over connors dad
I am stoned, not wearing a bra, and a woman. There is no way in fuck I am getting on a fucking bus.
So yeah, my old kindergarten teacher just asked me who gave me the hickies on me neck.
Are you serious?! She sent a pizza instead of showing up?!
She did indeed. Papa Johns. It helped because I was super hangry. That bitch is smart!
Randomize