I have demons in me.
ok please explain why some one shaved half of my pubes?
I walked into cold stone and the guy started preparing a supersized birthday cake remix for "Mrs. Munchies"
I just withdrew $200 in ones. I think the teller knew what was up
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Maybe we should try and tone it down a notch. The neighbors changed the name of their wifi network to "i can hear you having sex".
Steve is gonna hang his bear rug on the wall because he doesn't trust us not to have sex on it...
it was like a congratulatory penis slap
well I have to shit but I'm too hungover to push, and I snorted advil so I wouldn't have to swallow it and throw up.. hungover is an understatement.
My life hurts
I woke up 30 minutes away from the bar, my car was at a train station, and when I got home all I got was the speechless head shake
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You can't just drop that I might be walking into a foursome and leave it at that
You just kinda wondered into the street and started screaming at dogs and small children...
Now just crop his dad out and add it to the spank bank.
God dammit everything I said last night about jungle juice being awesome just does not carry over into the next day
The man at the checkout said "Somebody's not fucking around".
It's gonna be a good night
i don't care if you are my best friend. does not give you the right to describe how well my sister gives blowjobs.
how about your cousin?
Randomize