why didn't we just drop out of school years ago and become dominatrix bitches who beat men?
I don't know but we should still do that
No. I still stand by my previous statement that nachos and tequila is the breakfast of champions.
pretty sure i had my hand down BOTH their pants at the same time at some point...
you know what its like when everyone is chanting "do it, do it"...still friends?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
why is there a handicap sign in the bathtub and an exit sign in the kitchen?
lets deal with that after we figure out where i am
Condom broke. Took her to CVS for plan B and parked in expectant mothers spot. I laughed.. she cried
I owe you a thank you for last night. Only you could go up to a guy, ask if he likes my boobs, and return later to find us in a full on dance floor makeout sesh. Well played.
And now I have a massive dip in and a Bloody Mary that would catch on fire if you put a flame close to it, with no pants on... At 8:15Am. Being single is pretty legit
There has been a song made about you fucking his roommate.
It's destiny.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up naked buried in snacks. Best night ever.
In honor of the new administration, I'm going to make it my goal this weekend to get some lesbian action. Fuck Donald Trump and fuck Mike Pence. I'm going to be a spiteful gay.
Did you poop on the roof?
WTH?
Is that a no?
He spent ten minutes post bj, limp cock still out, in shock repeating 'best blow job ever'. So yes, yelling I am the penis queen out the car window was justified.
I would cock slap so many things if I had a cock.
I'm laying backwards. On the stairs. Eating carrots. And drinking from a captain Morgan bottle.
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