I need to buy a mesh tank top to fit in in Florida. Where do they even sell that shit?
why do married chicks ALWAYS cry after?
the beat of "birthday sex" is shockingly similar to my dry heaving rhythm. it's making me nauseous all over again.
Whatever you do to me, stop, I found yet another blonde hair in my asshole.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
for future reference: playing drunken strip-twister is a euphemism for a threesome. just thought you should know.
July 5th AKA Day of regret AKA picnicing in a laundromat. Someone puked allover the comforter. Liffe of champions.
Fuckers are stealing our internet and making my porn stream slowly so I changed the password for VanceRefrigeration to RyansaCunt. No spaces but capitalization.
I whispered "you're doing a great Job" when he was fucking me. Then high fived him.
I take it that, because we are not guzzling a box of franzia, everything went alright?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You did it first. I was merely expressing my support for you, by pressing my testicles against a window.
The highlight of my night was when you proclaimed that the man standing next to you smelt like grape medicine...
No! Last time I got hit with a beer bottle
Haha, Tuesday man
Your normalization of crazy is frightening.
Remember when I made out with that stranger at the bar on my 21 in chicago? I wonder how he's doing
His PENIS is so fucking big that I always use caps, out of respect.
Randomize