kicked my backpack and turned on my vibrator in the middle of class. success.
SHE has hooked up with both me and my sister. I don't even know what to say. If she goes for my parents next I may have to kill her
Hes laying on the floorn in the bathroom telling Jesus to raise the flag
Every once in a while you'd chuckle to yourself, and when I asked you what's so funny u replied "sometimes my toes tickle eachother"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was pretending that it wasn't happening. Until we had to roll down the windows as she was vomiting apologies into a Target bag.
Well on a positive note, crystal light now comes in margarita flavor
The Vegas crew is in two groups, Team Vodka and Team Fireball. There is no winner in this.
You were dancing with his friend and you stopped to literally push the girl he was dancing with out of the way to make out with him
There is booty call etiquette, and he just isn't following it. I'm not making you breakfast, gtfo.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Turning 21 will be slightly bittersweet. Never again will I be able to get underage drunk at Disney World, now I'll only be able to get legal drunk and that just sets a whole different and sad tone for my life.
Do you remember ripping my condom off last night while yelling "I DEMAND MY MEAT RAW" like a Viking?
I sent him a tit pic on accident and he replied with "nice ass"
Hooked up with a 20 year old. Only reason I did was cos I thought he was 18
I'm not sure. But he has a pet sugar glider. So, points either way
As long as that's not his name for his dick.
First things first, I always get more drunk than the birthday girl. Like, who's idea was it to sing karaoke? I killed it.
Randomize