Tell him to shut up cuz i said so. I lost my dollar shoe :(
Doug is wearing your sports bra fyi
My penis is the apex of life and all other references. Lookin for a cheap vagina at this point. And cheap Korean BBQ
Just found out that wake n bake is not one of the 7 habits of highly effective people..
Haha im Trying. This detox stuff tastes nasty. It's bad when the only thing that came to mind when i took the first sip was how good it would be with Vodka
This might sound awkward, but can I borrow a dildo for class?
at one point he was caressing me in the kitchen asking me my name over and over again and then asking what my favorite continent was
I'd say I should re evaluate my life choices, but I'd make the same decisions only faster and wearing a push up bra.
Did you know there's no emoticon to really tell you that I just consumed a magic brownie?
The walls are thin & apartments are narrow so all the bedrooms are next to each other. Our complex could compete in synchronized orgasms.
At our floor meeting the RA was talking about bathroom hygiene and I really wanted to be like "what about shower sex."
Valid question
there's a drunk hobo under the bridge wearing a jester hat and screaming at women
The sex is great, I just think it'd be better if we listened to Deftones during it.
just so you know.. snorkeling hungover: great decision. I was throwing up and he couldn't even tell!
Im experiencing the awkward moment after realizing two of my straight female friends have had sex with each other
Randomize