Astroglide: It's like Bengay for your ass.
Bring the cards this coming weekend. If I'm not here I died skydiving Friday
How's your threesome situation going?
Optimistic
i feel we're the only people who'd use nyquil sexually
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Queso dip and pictures of Daniel's penis. It's like the last days of Rome over here.
But I did spend part of my morning scrubbing your cum off my grandmothers piano.
He wanted me to choke him with my feet. So now I feel obligated to start writing my memoir
That portion can talk about stepping out of your comfort zone and how it can potentially kill people
Take home message: SPERM IS EVIL AND SHOULD NEVER EVER EVER BE ALLOWED UP ONE'S NOSE.
We are all done wearing pants today
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't want to just break his heart, I want to dip it in liquid nitrogen and then smash it until it's powder and snort the powder
He showed up on school grounds wearing nothing but a suit of armor. Really at this point I'm more impressed than angry.
I lick assholes and I wouldn't eat mdma
Dog. I woke up between my ex boyfriend witch i'm currently fucking and his bestfriend spooning me in MY bestfriends empty powerless house still really fucked up. No one knows what happend.
I CAN'T FALL IN LOVE WITH SOMEONE WHO HAS A LISP. I JUST CAN'T.
You can't say that. Only if you have peed on the side of the highway in daylight while signing Christmas songs can you say that.
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