I just decorated my birth control case with Lisa Frank stickers. If that doesn't scream 'I'm not ready for babies' I don't know what does.
Watched a women out our tannin salon literally fight police because she was getting arrested for trying to drunkenly fight the tanning salon owner...we need to step up our day drinking this is shameful.
Important update! My next door neighbours have a canoe. Repeat: THEY HAVE A CANOE! We are having sex in it before this summer is over.
I lost all of my bathing suit tops.. This is both a success and a failure
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My uterus feels like it went 8 rounds with Mike Tyson. And that was only a quickie.
Was banging my ex last night when his roommate walked in... We kept going. #goaheadandwatch
I'm discussing Magic Mike with my mom and totally get why she thinks I'm gay.
I just masturbated in the tanning bed stoned. Best decision of my life
You had sex with a kid to spare him the shame of being a virgin. Evidence is on my side.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How drunk are you?
Completed.
Also, we can't be seen together looking suspicious or sexually satisfied
I saw his new girlfriend. She was flashing people, short and kinda chubby. I was happy with my life after that.
It was get out of line and go pee and get no beef briskit. Or stay in line, pee my pants, but have beef briskit. I really wanted my beef briskit
Yelled "don't taze me bro" as the police officer tazed me. Cross it off the list.
When do you think the murder is going to happen in this Lifetime movie of ours?
Randomize