I've been emailing with a woman. I don't think she's into me, but we've become sorta email buddies. I'm hoping to meet her because on her profile she states she's into 'fisting.' Frankly the thought kinda freaks me out but I'm dying to see what kind of woman is 1) into that and 2) admits it upfront.
if I could go back to kindergarten and not fuck up my life, I so would.
I woke up this morning with a bag of pepperonis in my bed.... and my facebook status was "pepperonis"
I hate the hobo that sits outside our building
Joe or Chris?
do i even wanna kno y u kno their names?
well i came home drunk one night and Chris offered me a beer as i was coming in, it was kinda weird but i wasn't goin to deny a free beer. you're proolly talkin about Joe though, he's the one with the fucked up eye.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You paid the taxi driver with a comb last night.
dude there's no way we're going back in there for your puke shoes
Yeah but I was the kid who ran over your BMW and is banging your 15 year old daughter... There isn't a cool enough dad in the world to make that work.
In case you're keeping score at home, this is Brad's SECOND Doritos-related trip to the ER.
It started as ''I want a romantic life right now'' text. It ended with pool table sex.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just threw up in my front yard because my roommate was in the bathroom. Fuck New Years Day.
He's hot, you can get laid, and you may get free drugs. It's the trifecta of banging a drug dealer
I started my period on international women's day. It's like the world is congratulating me and punishing me for being a woman at the same time
Can you please stop having such an active social life? I'm tryna get fucked over here
Well, personally I like to keep my blackmail in well organised folders.
I mean, I let him sleep with me after we both ate taco bell sober... That's kinda like love, right?
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