I'm at breakfast still drunk holding a blow up parrot
I don't know what he sees in her. All I see are horrible pancake nipples
It's like that depressing moment when you drop your cocaine in the snow.
WHY AM I ALWAYS DEFEATED BY THE LATIN COCK?!?!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
please visit steve this weekend, he is getting mature and responsible and shit which scares me.
Mom just posted ur drunk pix from Cancun in the newly made "My not-so-fantastic son" album. Thought you should know.
In need of cum proof mascara. Don't judge me.
Their engagement party consisted of them doing shots, yelling at each other, leaving for 30 minutes, and coming back with smiles.
I'd say they're off to a great start!
No, I know her type. Tall, lanky, uses teeth when giving head, and runs like a giraffe. Don't do it man..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
the manly guy you want to date so badly? he's at the club. as a drag queen. wearing higher heels than you own. think about that.
Note to self, stop going out with self absorbed bisexuals
Will you skip merrily into hell with me?
I vaguely remember ordering a water at some point last night. It's good to know drunk me can still be responsible.
I think my dick has healed enough that we can start having sex again
I need to stop using "I went to the Harry Potter theme park" as my pickup line.
Randomize