i cant believe jose lima did steroids
apparently the kind that make you shitty at baseball
I'm driving behind a lime green VW that has "Seniors '10!" shoe polished on the rear window. i haven't even seen her yet, but I do have a boner.
Okay I've seen like three girls walking around crying today. Weird?
everyone's regretting their thursdays.
she definitely blew him on the riverbank, some lady floated past and said "have some pride honey", amazingly awkward
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i just ate a whole pizza and threw it back up in the time span of 13 minutes. give me the number to guiness book of world records.
We eventually get in a cab (after david tried to hail multiple regular cars and some sort of shuttle bus)
He made me a "booty call of the year" award.
It's the only time I've ever felt manly shitting myself
I feel you. We can get adjoining rooms. It'll be like Disney world, but with drugs and ivs instead of roller coasters and Mickey Mouse.
Which is way cooler
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I was going to do a cardio thing but then tacos.
Friends don't let friends go vibrator shopping alone.
Getting dome in the backseat of a friends car with Ariana Grande playing in the background was probably the most romantic part of my night
I shotgunned a beer immediately puked and rallied. And by rallied I mean had sex in the bathroom after he held my hair.
What a gentleman.
the last i saw he was butt naked on the top deck of the bus trying to conduct a drunken choir so i really have no idea
hotelroom bed is big enough to masturbate in, but small enough to not want to sleep in it after you've masturbated in it
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