Stoned at DSW. SO MANY SHOES! THEY'RE FREAKING ME OUT.
i also saw a trio of peacocks walking along a sidewalk in hollywood today. i really hope im not tripping.
I am intoxicated and cannot bring you a burrito. However, if you want to bring ME one...
Apparently as I was doing the walk of shame home my dad's date was on her way to hers. hoes come in all ages these days
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You were buying shots for everyone, saying, "I got a tax refund. I'm a MILLIONAIRE."
Honestly I think at this point I purposefully schedule nothing on Sundays anymore so I can spend all day wallowing in my shame.
I am the prescription. I can be taken orally or vaginally and in any dosage. This is why I went to med school.
think of it as grooming, as if he is my Kate Middleton and I'm grooming him to be a presentable princess
Also, beer. Big fan.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
DID YOU DO SOMETHING WITH THE DEAD ROACH IN THE KITCHEN? OR DID IT LAZARUS?
My mom is currently drinking alone in our kitchen singing the Dixie Chicks to herself so, hey, alcohol is forever and we should not be shamed for its use.
She's like the King Midas of sexual confusion. Everything she touches turns to gay.
Being a fine ass woman in a world full of fuckboys is the realest struggle I've ever known.
we just smoked for like ten hours and got froyo. not a bad start to the weekend.
I’m really upset they canceled the conference. Since the divorce I’ve been working out, I bought cute new outfits and even found a bikini I liked. Now it’s all online. You can’t get laid at a webinar
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