Why. Ill be the rabbit if ull be the carrot.
Just bonged a beer from a vuvuzela...this place is only doing good for me
If we went to a costume party as Batman and Robin I would go as Robin, that's how much you mean to me
Soup is not an acceptable meal before doing that many Jager bombs
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Have you ever seen a porn where they were playing bluegrass in the background?
he said he would handcuff me to his penis. thats not even possible. i want to go home.
Just had to find a way to explain to the border patrol that we were coming into canada "for about a half hour to have one last under 21 drink before kendals birthday at midnight." He said ok and told us where the closest bar was. Nice man.
How many people can say they've shit on the floor of a five star hotel?
So the woman who sold us weed at the park is pregnant. With another small child. And the basket she used to carry the joints is decorated with Barney stickers.
She's like a yuppie Nancy Botwin. She just gets better and better.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She really has to stop the coke at some point. Won't she run out of money eventually?
Won't she run out of nose eventually?
It was at the same house, but a different party, when lesbians set me on fire. So there's that.
Doing coke by yourself isn't as fun. Even when you're watching a James Franco movie.
Like you can't just be like oh bb and THEN SEND ME A FUCKING PICTURE OF MY 8TH GRADE FAT SELF IN A TACO COSTUME
Is it in poor taste to drop acid before midnight mass?
I love this.
So how often do you needs to see my tits today then?
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