After we smoked, the cops questioned us but i just asked if he wanted to join our basketball team.
Send us your Text From Last Night!
2pm: Breaking news alert: I think I'm finally sober. Oh, and that place needs hotter strippers.
He stole her cigarettes and walked 15 miles just so he wouldn't have to wake up next to her. God I love being a lesbian.
FYI, when you wake up, please note that I puked in your shoes because I sstubbed my tooee, not becus I was drunk.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I saw him on the jumbotron, its like god doesnt want me to forget his tiny penis
and then he put stevie wonder on to fuck to...and hummed along as I blew him
no, i'm currently making the trek across campus to get all my stuff from last night. My ID is in one guys bed, and my camera in another guy's bed.
I'm crawling around naked in my room looking for my hairbrush. Just thought I'd put that image in your head.
I keep waking up with the nagging feeling I gave him half a hand job through his shorts.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Apparantly 7 1/2 Vicodin is a 1/2 too many.
What did you wear last night? Because I'm pretty sure there are atleast 4 Facebook statuses about your walk of shame.
She's trying to master eating with her feet. She said it was be she "always has to be prepared."
Oh my god, I hid a wine bottle in my boot.
I was thinking of baby names while I was giving him a blow job