I hid a 6pack in the microwave for later
I knew I liked you
I was just about to go down on her when she gave herself a "smell check" and said "no, not today".
Can someone please explain to me how I got rugburn on my tits?
I'm like cupid
You're a whore with a bow and arrow
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
her facebook pictures are like a timeline of all the guys she's screwed.
Company party. Just told vp "you look like a cat person"
Last night after the bar I went home and ate a pulled pork sandwich in a bubble bath
they superglued a cigarette to my fingers...i think I need to quit smoking.
What kind of gift says: "I love you because you're my mom & I'm obligated to, but I don't like you" ?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
With the drought our water bill is skyrocketing. No more shower sex, masturbating, or pretending to be under a water fall after smoking a blunt.
Just saw a drunk bitch in the west village peeing on a car. You are not alone.
I was thinking that maybe I should not apply to Wells Fargo because they def have me on candid camera taking a drunken nap at 3am in their lobby.
If you're signed up as "sober sister" can you do cocaine or nah
This time tomorrow I will be drunk and in a voodoo shop
Had phone sex with my boss who I still haven’t seen in person. How’s your Monday ?
Randomize