I'm either too drunk or not bisexual anymore
Using pokemon references during sexual acts is always a good idea.
Your kinda stuck between a rock and his hard dick on this one..
My ex best friend's ex fuck buddy is visiting. There was no other option but day drinking.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Also I walked home in over mitts \nLet's take a minute to really laugh about that
who's idea was it to start the NCAA tournament less than a week after St. Patrick's day? My liver needs time to recover for things like this.
He was supposed to visit me tonight but he decided to stop in Tacoma so now I'm sitting on my bed naked eating oranges and candy corn while I watch Parks and Rec.
Now I have to hook up with him tomorrow DURING THE DAY.
I just swallowed some ecstasy stuck in my nose from last night. Work should be interesting.
I Have a huge scrape on my knee and I need a better excuse than dry humping on a park bench...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
"Do You Wanna Build a Snowman" came on while I was riding his dick. I had to take a moment.
Hahaha she was way into you and you kept arguing about burritos. It was amazing.
The tequila monkeys have a drum solo in my skull right now. I can't imagine Emily feels better.
I thought accidentally shaving off my fingertip while trying to shave my butthole was going to be the most unexpected part of my day, but no
What, wait. You are not supposed to drink wine out of the bottle?
I have hit the ultimate fuck buddy status. We pulled over in a construction zone to have a quickie.
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