So you maybe wanna hang out again? I could use the $5
Whatever I can do to help stimulate the economy
My penis is bigger than his and I don't even have a penis.
ugh.. my birth control just came out of my nose. wtf?
are you serious? he told me he had to cancel bc his grandma came into town
well unless his grandma is 21 and blonde, HE LIED TO YOU IDIOT
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Wait, how do girls masturbate?
I dunno we use shower heads I guess.
..how does it fit?
Every one of her profile pictures looks like an ad for American Apparel. Of course she has syphilis.
is cock-oriented a word? I'd say I'm that lately.
all i wanted was to be slutty. now i'm meeting him for drinks tomorrow because he woke up before i had a chance to sneak out and was too polite to say no
No she had like 2 shots and started ironing her clothes and whispering random shit in my ear
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I can't even type what I drank. I'll throw up
What shitty, shitty thing could you possibly tell me that doesnt top the fact that i got hammered and showed everyone i could shit while running
College: when you wake up drunk without pants and wearing a Cosby sweater
I'm getting a collar when he gets back in to town! That's like the bdsm equivalent of getting his class ring!
Sometimes I refuse to go through a door until someone holds it open for me because I'm a fucking lady.
Heyyyy, naked guy in your kitchen, can i ask you a quick question about a legal situation in pb??
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