At the doctor. They're doing a flu test now. He was like "where do you think you got this?" I said "bachelor party. Strippers." he goes "okaaaay I'll put 'other'."
Draw a picture of yourself puking and peeing on her and give it to her with a note that sys this could be your future if you be my friend
Well for one thing, she was eating rice with a shot glass.
dipping my christmas cookies in kaluha. santa would be proud.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the boy next to me on the plane handed me a shot glass, then a perkaset, and told me to have a good week off..hellllo spring break.
did i really just refer to you as "the mid season replacement"
No it's okay, we're just driving to random places with the portable stripper pole and causing a ruckus.
Oh that's normal
I can already see the regret in her eyes. Amazing night. This city rules.
God I hope the gutter I die in is nice. You know, for a gutter.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just found the last picture of me as a virgin. Framed it.
I've honestly never felt so much emotion towards a wall
We dug deep emotionally while eating cereal
No more weed for you
I woke up to Elf. I don't know which one of you put that in my DVD player when I passed out but I appreciate you.
4 pharmacies and not one had Plan B. If this is gods way of telling me it's time for a child, he can fuck off.
she has no right to get mad at us for drinking during the wedding. she's the one that chose the bridesmaid dresses with pockets.
Randomize