you know when i was in school the girls definitely did not have the tits the 15 year olds have now. so unfair.
i broke up with my boyfriend last night because i had to eat a freezy pop in every color and he ate the last blue one. i sat on the floor and cried for an hour at least. everyone left. so i decided that this whole weed thing isnt really healthy for my relationships.
now that we've slept with the entire soccer team i think its time to expand the horizon.
I'd be surprised if he had a problem with boundaries after helicoptering his penis in front of you
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yea idk it was like early in the morning and you were walking around with no shoes carrying a printer
I was so proud to be driving sober that I wanted to get pulled over so I could tell the officer I hadn't been drinking.
If you can get laid in a rudolph onesie you are doing something right my friend.
It's a given that you're going to get peed on at a country concert
Bad things happen to those who bang their lab partner at the beginning of the semester.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm about to start putting my tampons in the microwave for a few seconds these plastics applicators and this weather don't mix
In two unrelated events today I have had frostbite on my toe and cum up my nose. Who says life stops when you get married?
Me and you. The most fucked up people on the planet drinking together. Hell yeah
I promise not to pretend to be Jesus and take the wheel. But to my credit you shouldn't be saying that while I'm that drunk and we are in a car.
I DIDN'T WATCH THE PILLSBURY DOUGH BOY PORN!!!!
You got up in the middle of a sentence, puked, came out and poured another glass of wine and continued your story.
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