YEA!!! I'll throw you a non-baby shower.
Let's start a violent farting gang. We can do walkbys.
Woo Hoo! Just saw Asian kids with rocker mullets. Tried to get a picture on my phone, but you know how those ninjas are.
the last thing i remember is inserting the sippy stray into the jack daniel's.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
As I climbed in the bathroom window from the room I noticed both him rommates staring and talking about me in the hall...
You started drinking at 2:30, did you really think you would be able to remember?
Just had to hide the fact that I'm not wearing underwear from my 7 year old niece.
He used Kanye West lyrics to justify what happened and I accepted his logic
Tonight I celebrated marriage equality by letting a girl I don't know kiss me at the club.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So what if I got a tattoo on a bus, it was sterile.
You know darned well I have a well-documented weakness for redheads, Subway and hand-drawn graphic novels.
When do you estimate your next shower will be? Several people have asked.
Are you really trying to argue your case that you seduced my cat?
I gave him a hand job in the parking lot... now he thinks we're meant for each other...
Do you realize we were driving someone else’s car and I was holding the wheel while you were driving and sucking my dick. That’s NOT normal
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