Yo dont text me then not text me
I'm going to use my one free fuck up card tonight.
What'd you do?
Its more like what im about to do.
that was a gay-test. you passed.
with flying rainbow colors i hope!
six shots in, he is hammered and doing stretches before each shot
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Girl just texted me a pic of her boobs with the caption "don't think I'm a whore"
how the hell did u puke all over the magazines... do u still want me to keep them
It's 10am. I'm hungover wearing a flyers jersey and a phillies hat and eating a cheesesteak. I'm not the only one. Best city ever.
Just so you know, my new pet parrot tried to bond sexually with me today. That is what Google told me. I'm not sure of its gender.
I'm responsible for my client's overall well-being. Which is terrifying coming from someone that can't stop masturbating and eats leftover pizza just about everyday.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You were making out with a freshman and said you wanted to back to his place. Then when you got to the door to leave you said "never mind." He sad it wasn't fair and you got all serious and told him "welcome to the real world kid."
With gravity the way it is and your butt clearly being the size of a bus you'd break your hip or something
well apparently i sat in the bathroom staring in the toliet at my vomit. it was blue. how was your night?
The stripper started talking about murdering people....that lapdance turned dark.....
The closest thing I've had to an orgasm lately is sneezing nonstop from fucking allergies.
Tbh I’m not a vibrator enthusiast
But I am godly
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