Well that's not true. She had two social skills. She kept them in her bra
I feel violated. a guy just did an ultrasound on my balls. He made eye contact..
whoever put homecoming and halloween on the same weekend owes me a new liver and a get out of jail free card.
He's coming over, and I hope he doesn't get hungry. I'm sure its not proper protocol to bring one booty call to another booty call's house for the munchies.
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You're gonna judge me.
Howd you sleep with him already
I don't know what's more sad. The fact that I'm genuinely impressed about being sober for a whole 3 days or the fact that I want to get wasted in celebration.
tell me why they applauded then the bartender locked himself in the bathroom when i walked into the bar today ????
TOUCH YOURSELF. DO IT.
I don't think that's how you're supposed to sext
I immediately knew he was tripping, he came over with a grocery bag of snow balls and a bike helmet on and asked if I was prepared to die for my country.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If my bootycall doesn't bring over a Baconnator, I swear to fucking God, I'm not letting him in. The hunger is that real. Forget his Persian dick.
... and smoked a joint with my new landlord. I'm starting to like Germany.
Your face; I've seen enough of it for today. Go away now please.
As in, legitimately worried. You just sent me a 6 message long text that did not contain any complete words.
There is no rule that you can't be in a room with more than one dick that's been inside you.
I have only been here for a week and might contributed to a dumpster fire on accident.
Randomize