i need a new camera phone. my pictures from last night are as blurry as my memories. and neither tell me why i woke up in an airplane hangar.
do you think the kids from 7th heaven are mad that dennis and sweet dee are their half-brother and sister?
i walked into his room and he was eskimo kissing his weed..
Just saw a girl trying to crack an egg with her butt cheeks. I think I know what we're doing thursday night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If you dont, I will tell Dad you are gay.
Fine, and I will tell him you fucked his business partner
Previous statement retracted.
just got a girls number while on a 5 am adderall cig break this is college at its finest
Don't forget your talking to the guy who got arrested for throwing beads back at the Mardi Gras floats. You can't deny that's a first, and neither could that cop.
Ok, maybe I don't want to know what happened last night... But somehow I guess I moved the oven.
The security guard told you that the room was off limits and you just looked at him and said,"Its okay, I have a beard".
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She broke both of her ankles trying to jump off the balcony. it's like every time she drinks she makes even more impressively bad decisions than the last time
Dude your neighbors are having a garage sale. They were judging me as I walk of shamed back to my car.
I gave you a lap dance in a bowling alley... And I was Fine?
i spent my morning giving relationship advice to the kid i had sex with on a kitchen table this weekend
Apparently today is power bottom appreciation day
I just called my grandma crying, apologizing for being the first grandchild to have premarital sex...I'm either about to start my period or pregnant.
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