i've come to the conclusion that there is no classy way to apply chloroseptic spray to your butthole.
Apparently shes in the bathroom puking but eating a pot roast she found in the fridge at the same time.
I need a good reason NOT to eat this entire jar of nutella right now
i just got yelled at for having sex. this sorority thing is worst than being at home. at least at home they think im still a virgin
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
guy just got out of the car at the drive in and told his girlfriend "fuck you and your taco" and walked off
I got home and laid by the toilet and then alexa laid in the bathtub and sang the preamble while kayla held my hair
Admit it. It's a brilliant plan with hundreds of possible repercutions.
Understatement of the year.
I just sent him 3 long ass texts about how to tell a girl how he feels. I should get a fucking friend zone medal.
I will make you one.
Good. It needs "forever alone" engraved on it
My bra is still on the porch...I'm leaving it as a reminder to get my shit together.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nothing says "welcome to Denver" like a hot 18 year old giving you directions to the dispensary and ending up blowing you in the backseat
my dad pointed to my full beer and said drink up we're leaving now.
can you adopt me?
There a special place in hell for drunk criers. A special FUCKING PLACE
I just used my VA prescription bottle of xanax to get a military discount at the liquor store. I win.
Only you could get away with that.
he had hair everywhere except his balls
First aid class means get dry humped by moderately attractive college students during heimlich maneuver training.
Randomize