Yeah, it wasn't as bad as I thought. I tried not to clench and things went pretty smoothly.
Just heard a guy discussing with someone else the amazing blow job you gave him. I’m in New York. Over 2 hours away from where you live. I have never been more proud.
we hate each other therefore the sex is mindblowing
She tags her boyfriend in all of her pictures on her heart...
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Sorry, they don't make maternity Power Ranger suits...
she stopped traffic so I could crutch across the street. Clubbing while crippled and drunk is different.
He also turned out to be underage (the fucking liar) so we had to get drunk on cooking sherry
I'll be in SoCal at my bachelorette party, aka embracing a fireman covered in KY and chocolate shavings.
Then he shook the next streetlight but this one broke and fell over. He told me, "This is the part where we run."
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He licked my mouth. I felt like I was making out with my dog.
You can fuck right off with that, "If the earthquake isnt bigger than 5.0, we native Californians dont get out of bed." I am from Chicago. I can handle freak flash floods, polar vortexes and tornados. But my bed violently shaking at 6:30 in the morning is cause for some understandable concern.
Nothing says Happy Holidays like sending a picture of your ass to the wrong manager.
Let it be known that on this day, the 26th of October, in the year 2016, I successfully put both of his balls in my mouth at once.
I will consider today a failure if my nipple isn't bitten at least 😂
Oh is THAT how we're gonna play mini golf
when part of the plan includes getting high, i usually forget how the rest of the plan goes.
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