I don't know why girls would even talk to someone as drunk as I was.
thought i was the most hungover person in class until i saw a kid puke into his bookbag...he wins
Tell your boyfriend I'm sorry for ruining his vein. I'm never drawing blood drunk again.
I'm gagging in the liquor aisle just thinking about how much alcohol I'll be drinking this weekend.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yeah, I probably scared him away when I drunkenly told him we'd have beautiful children
Yeah I had this grand plan to bring flaming dr pepper shots to some girls and say "these shots are hot, but not as hot as you" but instead I lit the bar on fire
Nothing says love like couples STD testing
Nothing says breakup like the results
It was just...long. I started around 2. And I think i went to bed around 2. So 12 straight hours? I remember a milkshake and frozen grapes.
You blacked out at 9:30 and insisted on sleeping in the hallway after you chugged an entire pitcher of beer. I guess the Jell-O shots were stronger than we thought...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
At least I got steroids and a baguette out of the deal
I really need to stop sending pussy pics if I'm going to be running for state representative in November
Knew i was going to puke. So i grabed a bowl out of the kitcken in the dark before bed...Ended up puking into a spaghetti strainer...
How do I let my trainer know I'm only at the gym so I can get in more intense sex positions?
Im glad your laughing because im currently convincing my penis you didnt mean it and its all gunna be ok.
I just woke up naked in a bed with your brother. WHAT THE HELL HAPPENED TO NOT LETTING EACH OTHER DO STUPID THINGS?
You fucked my brother?!
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