And then she said we stopped for a train and i tried crawling out the back window.. again, i dont remember this.
I just saw a fat chick walking across campus talking to herself and licking her lips. Diet season is scary.
Just used my cancer results to get a free lap dance. Great day just got better.
Call 911 I'm faking my own death so this fat chick leaves my room
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I had ketchup on my elbow and a random girl goes "I got it" and licked it off, only on game day
He made me meet him in the baby department of walmart where he was waiting with his pregnant girlfriend. Time for a new dealer
Cavemen vs astronauts. weapons to be determined. Who would win?
there is nothing ok with the fact that that was the 4th time i peed in the same parking ramp
Then me, her, and her mom snorted tequila. The bartender was in shock.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
New BDSM fun fact. When you get spanked hard enough with a flat object, you get welts. Welcome to thunderdome, bitches.
my drivers license is super glued to my shoulder and im to hung over to get it off come and help me
I am about five seconds from ripping off my clothes and throwing myself into the ocean to become a mermaid
you said you wanted to call me grandma and give me hugs
I was so high I could TASTE the fillings in my teeth
whoevers yellow car is in your driveway right now... i plan to steal. just an FYI
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