Fuck their fairy tale bullshit. I shall ruin it. With a few thrusts of my cock.
This is a mass text. Does anyone know where I am?
No. I still stand by my previous statement that nachos and tequila is the breakfast of champions.
The best time of year to be high is WHEN THE KING CAKES ARE HALF OFF BECAUSE MARDI GRAS IS OVER YEEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH
It's confirmed. We did xmas carol the grocery store across the street from his building at 2:30am... Only the staff was there.
There's a stripper banging on the door demanding to see you.
Found your dick twin last night
Ummmmm okay let's be incredibly straightforward. Hi there. My bed's at half capacity this evening. How'd you like to fill it up?
I just brushed my teeth. In the car. With watered down Sprite. From Saturday. Multi-tasking at its finest.
His morals are debatable, but his heart or perhaps his penis is in the right place.
His penis is crooked. Right place? Maybe he starts there, but then he slants.
I just laughed at the word pudding. I have no idea whats going on right now.
If anything I look like a soccor mom going out for her annual ladies night. Trying hard, but not quite in her twenty's anymore.
I'm going to make you a sign to put on your penis to ward others off
They're gonna put "is a hoe" on my medical records
Also, asking the guy who just told you he is crippled on edibles to watch your kid is probably frowned upon by most
Randomize
